Oh, I so would...

ricky_wilson.jpg


After watching him host 'Never Mind the Buzzcocks', Ricky Wilson is now vying with Guy Garvey at the top of my 'Singers I'd Like To Lick All Over' list.


*drifts off into a pleasant reverie*
4.4.06 11:36


*smiles*

Oh, I am in such a good mood right now, due to a variety of reasons.


(1) It's Spring. Oh, I know it may not really feel like it, what with the snow and the cold and all, but believe me, the sap is definitely rising.


(2) I am wearing a brand new pair of skinny jeans. Skinny jeans, people! Suddenly all that time spent sweating in the gym seems so wonderfully worthwhile.


(3) I watched 'Napoleon Dynamite' for the first time last night. Dang!


(4) Rehearsals for the show are going really well. Sure, I've got a bruise on my neck where one of the actors got a bit over-zealous during my big confrontation scene, but you've got to suffer for your art.


(5) Most importantly of all, it is only 33 days until 13th May. What happens on 13th May, I hear you ask? Well, that is the day I MOVE IN WITH TRILBY! Woo! Yeah!


If life was any better, they'd have to make it illegal.
11.4.06 09:31


Feathering

As the minutes count down to Moving In With Trilby Day, I find myself going a bit loopy. It's his own fault, really - one should never underestimate the nesting instinct of the woman knocking on the big door marked 30.


The thing is, Trilby has lived in his house for about 6 years, since he was a drama student. And he's never really put his stamp on it. The walls are all magnolia (except for the small bathroom, which I repainted in white and aqua last year). Most of the walls are also scuffed and marked and dirty. There are hardly any pictures on the walls. Nothing matches.


Basically, it's a boy's house.


I, however, am a girl. And when I look at Trilby's abode, I don't see a house. I see a big, blank canvas. I see a project. I'm trying not to come over too Linda Barker, but sometimes I can't help myself.


My current obsession is the kitchen. It's the same shade of magnolia as the rest of the house (Christ, I hate magnolia. It's such a non-colour, it makes me angry). I'm currently dreaming about painting it a crisp ice blue, then maybe picking out selected tiles with indigo paint. And perhaps even investing in one of these little beauties, just to add that certain something:



Trilby's going to dump me for being a mentalist, isn't he?
11.4.06 10:56


Scrubber

Trilby:  I'm working tomorrow.


YAAGers:  Oh, baby. How crap that you have to work on a bank holiday.


Trilby:  What are your plans?


YAAGers:  I'm going to clean your kitchen.


Trilby:  Oh. That's, um... nice.


 


So my to-do list for Good Friday is as follows:


- Defrost freezer. Mop up resultant lake of meltwater. Dispose of frozen corpse of Captain Oates.


- Clean fridge. Lay waste to colony of intelligent bacteria that have set up a small, enlightened society in the egg tray.


- Clean behind fridge (*shudder*). Fight off any crumb-based life forms with a mop.


- Clean floor until there are no more mysterious sticky patches.


- Damp dust cornices and skirting boards. Remove cobwebs before Shelob returns to her lair.


- Clean oven. Weep.


- Clean extractor fan (with vinegar).


- Wash windows (with vinegar).


- Clean sink, taps and splashbacks (with vinegar).


- Try to rid self of the smell of vinegar. Fail. Go to chip shop to satisfy inexplicable craving for a fish supper.


 


Never let it be said that I don't know how to have fun.
13.4.06 13:19


Fin... and begin again

The play is over. I'm knackered, my throat hurts from all the cigarettes I smoked on stage (and off - oops!) and I still wake up in a cold sweat when I think about the night I came on a scene too early, to the confusion of cast and audience alike (my solution? Smoke a cigarette and pretend it's some sort of clever "split screen" device. Oh, the shame).


So what have I been doing today?


Why, sending off letters to try and get another acting job of course.


It never bloody ends.
25.4.06 12:52


Cake for breakfast


Oh, the decadence. I feel like Marie Antoinette.
27.4.06 12:04


(ramble)

I've been messing about on the computer when I should have been working. Again.


It's my birthday in a couple of weeks, and I really, really want to have a "Cowboy versus Ninja versus Pirate" party, where everyone has to dress up as a cowboy or a ninja or a pirate and we get drunk and fight to see who is the hardest.


So I've been messing about with MS Paint, making an invitation for it (adapted from a design by a very talented chap called Mike Piontek). Check it:



Oh, it would rock like Gibraltar if the party panned out the way it is in my head. But I just know that everyone would be all like "What, we have to dress up?" and it would all be disappointing and crap. And we wouldn't have a big fight, we'd just end up getting drunk and playing Jenga. Again.


I wish things were like they are in my head. Then I'd be able to dance in the street whenever I felt like it and cats would talk and Doctor Who would land on my roof terrace to tell me he's ditched that Rose chick and would I like to come to the year 1556 with him?


I might make that flyer into a t-shirt, though. I think it's pretty cool.


 


 
27.4.06 15:41


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